Saturday, June 20, 2009

Father's Day

Father's day is Sunday and it is always a special day to me. My dad and I are very close. He can make me laugh faster than anyone. He loves to be silly around me and calls me his sunshine. It doesn't matter how old I get....I will always be a daddy's girl. This Father's day is a little different because my Mom is on my mind this weekend. We have had a lot of changes recently....a lot of excitement, I guess.

Last October, my mom received a phone call that forever changed our family. It was a call from a lady looking for my aunt, but it started a chain of events that affected Mom dramatically. She made a decision to tell a secret she had kept for 46 years. When Mom was 18 and just out of high school, she was raped. I won't go into details, but she ended up pregnant in a time when it was not accepted the way it is now. In fact, her parents didn't even accept it. They hid her from everyone, family included, and even went as far as to tell her that if anyone found out she wouldn't be loved by anyone. So, she kept this secret from everyone. The only time it was ever mentioned by my grandfather was on Mom and Dad's wedding day when he reminded Mom not to mention it or Daddy would never forgive her.

So all these years, Mom has lived with this secret thinking that no one could know. Then a phone call comes. A lady that reunites adopted kids with birth parents. Mom ended up telling her the story and the lady said that she could help her if she wanted. Mom made the hard decision to tell her story. She told Dad first, then David and me. We all told her we would support her decision, no matter what it was.

It took her some time, but she decided to look for the baby that she was forced to give up 46 years ago. Two weeks before our planned California vacation, a call came that Mom had had a girl and that they had found her.......in California! Most importantly, she wanted to talk to Mom. Dad called and I ran over to their house and we waited for the phone to ring. Finally it did and Mom and Diane had their first conversation. It was so funny to listen to them talk. It was non-stop for a long time. Mom mentioned that my family was going to Cali and Diane said we should meet up. Mom and Dad decided to meet us out there and we met. It was an exciting and nerve-wracking time, but we made it through it and came out of it with a budding friendship. We met Diane, her husband, Fernando, her son, Marcus, and her Mom, Shirley. It was a great visit.

Now, why do I tell this story on Father's day? When my mom told my dad about this secret that she had kept for their 44 year marriage, his response, "I wish I would have known you then, so I could have taken care of you." And, "I wish your father was still alive, so I could tell him how wrong he was." That is the kind of man my father is. That is why I love him so much!
I am the most blessed woman. I have the strongest example of what a marriage should be, forgiveness, unconditional love and understanding. I love you Mom and Daddy, unconditionally and forever.


Diane, Mom, Savannah and Me.

6 comments:

amy wright said...

I just think this is such an incredible story. I hate that your mom had to carry that alone for so many years...but good things come to those who wait. :)
Did you just stare at Diane and try to find resemblances? I'm doing that by looking at the picture. ha
You have an awesome daddy! Love you guys. Congratulations!!!

Dawn Lowe said...

Okay, now I am crying! Seriously, tears are welling up right now. What a beautiful story and a beautiful tribute to your Dad! I am sure your Mom feels great relief in letting go of something that has held her in bondage all those years! Your Father sounds like an amazing man - Happy Father's Day!

Knock On Wood said...

Pass the kleenex DL - I'm bawling too! What an incredible story! Your mom and dad are such amazing people - look at you! Thank you for sharing!!!! Hugs -a-

Ilene said...

Oh My Stars!! This is an amazing story! Thank you so much for sharing it. You do have a fantastic mom and dad! They are truly awesome people.

We are so glad you are back. We missed you all!

Enjoying the journey... said...

What a neat post and so wonderful that you got to meet her!! I myself learned 5 years ago that I have a half brother that my mom gave up for adoption 47 years ago. I often think about him and pray I will know him someday, if not here than in heaven. Oh how I wish there was the openness and acceptance that is evident in your picture! Maybe someday. Thanks for sharing and enjoy your new family journey together.

ziondreamer said...

Wow Debbie. Thanks for sharing. Incredible! I'd love for you to post more on the story.
Good to hear from you the other day!

About Me

My photo
I am a blessed woman. I have a wonderful husband and three great kids. I am privileged to be able to stay home and teach my boys here. My daughter goes to a Christian Academy. I love my life and my family makes me proud and fills my life with laughter on a daily basis. I have been reading blogs for a while now and I hope to share the fun and trials that we go through with all of you as you have shared with me.

Followers