Father's Day

Father's day is Sunday and it is always a special day to me. My dad and I are very close. He can make me laugh faster than anyone. He loves to be silly around me and calls me his sunshine. It doesn't matter how old I get....I will always be a daddy's girl. This Father's day is a little different because my Mom is on my mind this weekend. We have had a lot of changes recently....a lot of excitement, I guess.

Last October, my mom received a phone call that forever changed our family. It was a call from a lady looking for my aunt, but it started a chain of events that affected Mom dramatically. She made a decision to tell a secret she had kept for 46 years. When Mom was 18 and just out of high school, she was raped. I won't go into details, but she ended up pregnant in a time when it was not accepted the way it is now. In fact, her parents didn't even accept it. They hid her from everyone, family included, and even went as far as to tell her that if anyone found out she wouldn't be loved by anyone. So, she kept this secret from everyone. The only time it was ever mentioned by my grandfather was on Mom and Dad's wedding day when he reminded Mom not to mention it or Daddy would never forgive her.

So all these years, Mom has lived with this secret thinking that no one could know. Then a phone call comes. A lady that reunites adopted kids with birth parents. Mom ended up telling her the story and the lady said that she could help her if she wanted. Mom made the hard decision to tell her story. She told Dad first, then David and me. We all told her we would support her decision, no matter what it was.

It took her some time, but she decided to look for the baby that she was forced to give up 46 years ago. Two weeks before our planned California vacation, a call came that Mom had had a girl and that they had found her.......in California! Most importantly, she wanted to talk to Mom. Dad called and I ran over to their house and we waited for the phone to ring. Finally it did and Mom and Diane had their first conversation. It was so funny to listen to them talk. It was non-stop for a long time. Mom mentioned that my family was going to Cali and Diane said we should meet up. Mom and Dad decided to meet us out there and we met. It was an exciting and nerve-wracking time, but we made it through it and came out of it with a budding friendship. We met Diane, her husband, Fernando, her son, Marcus, and her Mom, Shirley. It was a great visit.

Now, why do I tell this story on Father's day? When my mom told my dad about this secret that she had kept for their 44 year marriage, his response, "I wish I would have known you then, so I could have taken care of you." And, "I wish your father was still alive, so I could tell him how wrong he was." That is the kind of man my father is. That is why I love him so much!

I am the most blessed woman. I have the strongest example of what a marriage should be, forgiveness, unconditional love and understanding. I love you Mom and Daddy, unconditionally and forever.

Diane, Mom, Savannah and Me.

My Grandma- a true lady.

This last week has been a tough one for my family. In the midst of all of the last of school busyness, my grandmother past away. Two and a half years ago, she had several strokes and her health had been slowly getting worse. It is hard to say that the death of a loved one is a blessing, but I had really lost my grandma two years ago. She had lost most of her sight and the ability to get around on her own. She would have days that she could communicate really well and then others where she couldn't get her words out. She lived most days in the past with her brothers and sisters and even her mother who had passed away before I was born.

But that is not how I want to remember her. I want to remember the classy lady, who never had a bad thing to say about anyone. Who always looked so beautiful and never even tried to. She loved to laugh and her true joy in life was her family. She especially loved her great-grandkids. She missed David and Brittney who live in Iowa and always couldn't wait for them to come and spend time here. My kids were so blessed to have her here. They would take turns spending the night with her and loved to cook breakfast with her. She was so much more patient with them than I will ever be.

She and Savannah had an extra special relationship. I see a lot of Grandma in Savannah, so much more than just her name. Savannah has the inner beauty and love of life that she had. Chandler was also named for grandma. I grew up knowing that I wanted to name my little girl after Grandma and when I found out Chandler was a boy, I figured that he wouldn't appreciate the name Savannah as much. Then when we had Savannah, Grandma ended up with two namesakes. No one could make Grandma laugh like Chan. He has a way of lighting up a room with his sense of humor. Sometimes she couldn't believe the things that he would say or do. Daniel was Grandmas helper. When my grandfather was sick with cancer, Daniel would always help Grandma get him ready for bed or settle him in his chair to watch t.v. I think that Grandma really admired Daniel's strength and kindness. Did I mention that Daniel was only 4 when Grandpa passed away?

Savannah Scott Chandler was the kind of lady that I hope one day I will be. She was a great person who touched the heart of everyone who met her. I will miss her every day. It is so strange to think that she is not here to visit with anymore. But I know that I will see her again. Along with being such a great example of the kind of person to be, she was a Christian. She is with her mom and her brothers and sisters and my grandpa. She is happy and singing again. She has a new, healthy body. And most importantly, she is looking into the face of Jesus! How we all look forward to that day!!!

I had this picture made of Grandma and Savannah

just a few months before her strokes. I am so glad

that I did. This is a cherished memory.

Here is my grandma doing what she

loved the most, playing cards with her

family. This is how I will always remember

her.